yay, its me, finally updating.
a proper update, nevertheless.

well, i wonder..
what am i thinking,
it seems like i just worry too much about things that wouldn't happen, overstress until the importance of life or death, care too much about stuffs i shouldn't ..
i'm sick and tired.
it just means so much, yet so little
the pieces flying away from my hands,
one by one, gone with the wind.

went for tution.
before that chiong the stupid zaoju
wth luh, 7 textbook chapter, screw it man.
then, do the paper.
damn okay, but a certain question stumped me.
then looklook, because followed ms quah's summary method,
i ended up wasting lots of time on summary which i thought i wouldn't.
damn.
no blame to ms quah - she meant good afterall, hopefully i pass.

then in the mrt, like a raving lunatic, i was there reciting the zaoju like shit.
they don't mean anything, cause words are dead, no matter how alive they seem, or how meaningful. It's only up to a person perception whether the person wants to hear/listen/follow and use the knowledge given freely to him with the help of internet, books, resources.

huijia looked emo. so halfway through the class i was sms-ing her, worried about her.
i phew-ed a sigh of relief when teacher told us she just giving us practices to do, maybe i worried too much overall.

guys are simply idiots with no brains, especially the one im mentioning here. he irritated the small kid by teaching the older bro in the class how to gamble. gamble away family somemore, make the small kid cry, so evil, and wanted to "take" the small kid home with him, philophile siaaa!

hnin hnin was bullying me on msn as usual. zzzz, and she reminded me that i said LAST YEAR that THIS YEAR i was gng to wear ethnic costume, but stm, so forgot, and didn't borrow, so need to leave it up to next year ^^ waahahahahas, i'll look fugly as usual, so heckcare uh. lucky, one year just simply comes and goes, ain it.. time seems so short now, constrainted by the usual needs of human necessarities.
(but it was amusing the part where she said i said that last year, cause i forgot)

hahas.

suddenly i had the initative to speak to kenneth again,
somehow although we have alr patched up and become friends,
it seemed too be just too late,
too late to return to the past.
if only, i didn't pick up her call.
if only, i ignored her sms.
if only, i had went to sleep then.
i guess, everything would be fine, i would be still habbo-ing and everything will be the same, i'll be deejaying..enjoying what i used to do.

i still don't understand why i can't let go,
i have been harping over this matter for ages,
but i just cannot move on.
i still miss the times.
it's like clinging on to a thread, which has alr broken.
pointless, but it just affected me too much.
the scene that happened months ago just repeatedly and repeatedly remind me how things fell apart, how i just went to sec3 camp to run away from reality..
and made it so much worse.
and when we patched, how i ran away again, escaping to shenzhen and hongkong ..
i dunno, i still cry sometimes when i think of it, just not as frequent as before,
but nevertheless, the feelings, though stagnant are still there,
it just meant too much for me to ditch, and abandon.
i'm sorry guys, for letting it go.
i couldn't bear it anymore.
it was too heavy a burden.
..

and, i don't cry.
i don't cry in school.
definitely.
no matter how things go, i must never cry in school,
no wonder how the tears just flow freely when i cry alone at home, quiet, serene enviroment, enjoying it all.


quiz, #06

Answer the following questions:


1. The person who last tagged you is...
Asyraf

2. Your relationship with him/her is...
uhhh, friend and classmate ^^

3. Your 5 impressions of him/her...
English-speaking, loves to play his guitar, loves his mates, has a strong ambition to win me, is actually a very nice and kind guy ^^

4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you...
well, shake my hand foor good luck in secondary two last year when i was just about to go for the weatherstudy competition with my team members son last year sports day..calming down my nerves.

5. The most memorable words he/she had said to you...
dun always beat me (as written beside my bloglink in his blog.)

6. If he/she becomes your lover, you will...
._. well, uhh, do nothing? what am i supposed to do anyway?

7. If he/she becomes your lover, things he/she should improve on will be...
Gender.. to join the gay gang, somehow...

8. If he/she becomes your enemy, you will...
cry ):

9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be...
feel upset for losing a good friend.

10. The most desired thing you want to do for him/her now is...
wait for his tag reply ):

11. Your overall impression of him/her is...
a crazy hilarious funny bugger ^^

12. How you think people around you will feel about you?
they will feel that i don't deserve him.

13. The characteristics you love about yourself are...
uh. I got moodswings ^^

14. On the contrary, the characteristics you hate about yourself are...
I seem to lose my way whenever i go.

15. The most ideal person you want to be is...
somebody confident.

16. For people that care and like you, say something to them...
why are you even my friend? You must be absolutely crazy man.

17. Pass this quiz to 10 persons that you wish to know how they feel about you:
1. Hninhnin
2. Huaiyue
3. Jean
4. Shili
5. Irene
6. Weexin
7. Mary
8. Kirin
9. Inshirah
10. Huimin

18. Who is no. 6 having a relationship with?
ummm, i think she's still single.

19. Is no.9 a male or female?
female, duh?!

20. If no.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing?
both girls, gao les arh.

21. How about no.8 and 5?
it would be a crazy pair.

22. What is no.2 studying?
uhhh, amaths,emaths,d&t,combined sciences, geography and mt.

23. When was the last time you had a chat with no.3?
recently, last fri, in school, recess time.

24. What kind of music band does no.8 like?
well, i think crazy :D

25. Does no.1 has any siblings?
Yea! one younger brother

26. Will you woo no.3?
She's my laopo =.=" how to woo sia, btw, im not les.

27. How about no.7?
I don't do guys!!

28. Is no.4 single?
Not sure, but seems like he is still single! Go Ben!

29. What is the hobby of no.4?
chatting, using sms or phone and watching television.

30. Do no.5 and 9 get along well?
uh, never seen them talk to each other before

31. Where is no.2 studying at?
Shuqun secondary.

32. Say something casually about no.1.
a genius freak of a bestfriend ^^ (LUNATIC^^!)

33. Have you tried developing feelings for no.8?
I'm not les ):

34. Where does no.9 live at?
teban gardens.

35. What colour does no.4 like?
blue. pink. idk lah.

36. Are no.5 and 1 best friends?
they are good friends.

37. Does no.7 likes no.2?
likes as in? Platonic sense, OFCOURSE! cause they will discuss on how to bully me ):

38. How do you get to know no.2?
primary school, when serving duty as freelance librarian :D

39. Does no.1 have any pets?
used to, but not now.

40. Is no.7 the sexiest girl in the world?
uhh, -no comment, later she read, kill me ): I still wanna live.

41. Do you think its possible if no.4 and no.5 date each other?
no, cause it's a homosexual relationship LOL.

42. Say something more about no.6.
she's cute, and remind me of piglet. :D

43. What is your relationship with no.9?
uh goodfriends.

44. List all the schools that no.1 to no.10 are in and originally from.
1. Swiss Cottage/Shuqun/Burma school
2. Shuqun/Princess Elizabeth
3. Shuqun/Rulang
4. Shuqun/Yuhua
5. Shuqun/Yuhua
6. Shuqun/Yuhua
7. Shuqun/Yuhua
8. Shuqun/Fuhua
9. Shuqun/Qifa
10.Shuqun/Yuhua
(If i am accurate)

45. What would you do if no.10 hates you?
): i will cry de D:

46. Which of the following are in a relationship?
ditto.

47. How did you first meet no.3?
school, first day somemore :D

48. How would you react if no.3 and no.10 are together?
uhhhhh, freak out.

49. What would you do if no.4 tells you she is pregnant?
._. find out whose child ^^

:D!