oops

well, blogger finally seem to be able to work finally.

i was so enthus yesterday cause ..

I DIDN'T LOG IN TO COMP FOR 6DAYS.
6 MISERABLEEE BLOODDDDYY DAYS.
GOT LOTS LOTS TO SHAREEEE

LOL -crazys.

dunno whether it's just me.
or whatever,
it seems that i can't let go of things.
i can't forget your existance,
how much it once MEANT to me.

but now..
i guess it's alright,
to be friends again,
to play pranks on you again.
and everything.

i need to say thanks,
thanks for being once a part of my life,
for 28 minus 3 days.
25 days.
thankslots,
thanks for th memories.

--

i figured out my emotions after school reopen-ed.
how could i be so stupid.
so stupid not to figure it out.
how dumb.
from th start, i loved you.
and i'm still loving you.
i don't know when it started,
when you first came to my attention on th first day of school?
maybe.
i thought i was in love,
with th wrong guy.

you mean alot.
anyway, doesn't matter,
i'll still be your good classmate,
your guardian angel.




anyway, ..
i ..
reallly.
feel sad.

crestfallen goes th girl staring in th wide blue sea, pondering whether th sea is able to swallow her up.

LOL! sorreh eh, dumb me.
nobody ever reads my posts ^^.
so i can stop blogging?
pl0x.
ahaha.

PRIVATEEEEBLOGGG.
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~

kidding,
nowadays in sch is like .. damn crappeh.

i feel like SCREAMING and SHOUTING to th teachers,
I WANT MORE TO DO, GIMMIE MOREEE.
LOLL.
for english and chinese only x.x

I want learn,
you dn't lemme.
I wanted to know where my standards are,
you didn't tell me.
what you want me to do now?
it's so ridiculous can.
I want study more,
I want do extra,
I want improve on my results,
you don't lemme.
THEN WHAT IS TH POINT OF STUDYING MORE?
damnit.

It's so incredible lonely.
do you know what it feels like,
to feel hurt, to be lost, to be left out in th dark, to be kicked when you're down, feel like you been push-ed around, to feel all th end of breaking down, nobody ever understands you and you don't know what it's like, welcome to my life.

all my best friends and competitors are in th other class.
th only time i can see them is in f&n, history and chem and chinese.
wtf is this man.

i don't know what i'm doing in 3a.
i poke into other ppl's conversations shows that i'm lonely and forlorn.
i answer th teacher's question cause i got nothing else to do, besides staring at th teacher and staring at the whiteboard.

nobody ever cares,
complain all you want la.
see if i care.
scold me behind my back la.
see if i care.
shout at me all th way you want,
i'll take it and just ignore you.

that's my way of survival.

from now,
nobody's getting close,
nobody's gonna figure me out,
i ain letting anybody hurt me again.
it hurts ya know,
to know that your supposedly-friends talking behind your back,
dramatically whispering.
to know that you can't trust anybody with your deepest secrets,
in case it leaks out.

it's sad.
a sad case.

i'm going back to sec1a,
to shut up, to listen, to pay attention to the teacher, to take a book and read all i want, to have a sad frown on my deepdeep CHUBBY lil face, and cry.

let th rain fall down and wake my dreams,